My Life Is

I am what you would call one with zero patience. Even with the smallest things like purchasing something online, I would find myself waiting by the door for the FedEx truck to arrive two days before it is scheduled to be delivered. For as long as I can remember, my mother has always warned me about finding patience and explaining to me that it is a virtuous thing. Well, let’s just say that I wasn’t trying to hear it.

So it is now going on the second year of being natural and the process has truly been a journey. With the encouragement of a wonderful woman and the desire to be natural, I went to the salon one day after work and just did it; I cut all my hair off. It was one of the most terrifying experiences of my life. I can no clue what to expect. Prior to that day, I would sit around and imagine my appearance without the permed mane that I had always healthfully maintained. But being natural was tugging at me like a small child on a mother’s pant leg. I had to surrender.

Needless to say, it was one of the best decisions that I will ever make in life. And it came with its own challenges; patience. The patience of waiting for your hair to grow and develop into what ever it decides to naturally. This is where I have a new found virtue, where I wait for my hair to grow. As much as I was afraid of my lack of patience with the growing process, I have found myself at peace and enjoying every bit of my natural journey. Of course, I can’t wait until it grows and grows but most of all, I am loving right now. Each moment that I am in is cherished to the fullest throughout this process.

So now I have patience and I love it. It truly is a virtue and a work in progress as I maneuver through life.

Light and Love,

Tina

As I watch old episodes of Grey’s Anatomy on Netflix, I am reminded of the time when I had to choose a doctor for my insurance. Unfortunately for me, I had to choose quickly because of a particular health issue that I was having at the time. Something that a dear friend and close family member told me would take only one visit to fix.  I knew that I didn’t want any of those ‘Izzie’ doctors on Grey’s that cared way too much and took too long to give me bad news. No, I wanted a ‘Christina’ kind of doctor. A doctor who gives it to you straight, quick and blunt, no bullshit. I am not the care showing kind of person (or so I think) and I didn’t want that kind of doctor.

Well, my dear friend and close family member were wrong. Dead wrong, but they could have had no clue there would have been so much more. Neither did I, which reaffirmed my hatred for doctor visits and hospitals. My little situation turned into possible cancer and infertility and calls to mommy and a cousin (who knows way more about my life than she probably wants to) from over 400 miles away. Scared out of my mind, I figured that I would tough it out with my kick-ass no bullshit kind of doctor. 

Well, I was wrong. Dead wrong. The very invasive test that I had to undergo was awful and traumatising to say the very least. I requested that no one travel from 400 miles away to be present with me and that was a mistake as well. That ‘Christina’ doctor that I thought I would love and appreciate was exactly what I wanted her to be; cold, distant, and blunt. It was exactly what I did not want after that experience, which brought me to an interesting conclusion about the type of doctor that I wanted. I have always said that you never know a person until you make them mad. This goes the same for doctors, but in a different way. You never truly know a doctors abilities until they are put to the test, or when you are placed in a medical situation where their “people skills” are put to the test.

I now have one of those ‘Meredith’ doctors who care as much as they can but give me the business when I need it. It’s great. Nothing like a little care from a doctor, but not too much. Lesson learned. A little love goes a very long way.

Love and Light,

Tina